Sometimes in a novel, you read a moment whose unexpected truth makes you smile. A feeling you have been subconsciously trying to identify in your own life is suddenly brought before your eyes with perfect clarity. You realise this is exactly what you’ve been trying to say: a sentiment which feels so familiar though it has never been consciously thought – swimming in the deeper parts of your mind. The expression in words is clear, simple and poetic, to match the feeling.
“Solitude is a condition best enjoyed in company”
When I read this in Eleanor Catton’s ‘The Luminaries’, it seemed to answer an unspoken question about the last couple of months. Hayley and I have talked about the pros and cons of travelling alone, and have always agreed that we would much rather be with a friend (if it’s the right one…). We are both happy in our own company and have previously liked doing things by ourselves, like walking the dog, or going to see a film that no one else wants to see. And it isn’t necessarily the big experiences that are enhanced by the presence of a friend, the focus being your relationship with what you are doing. But it is the everyday parts of travelling which are made so much better: bus journeys, working days; moments of static, when you stop to take in a view.
There is a romanticism to the idea of solitude which forms a perfect accompaniment to travel; this sense that you can only “find yourself” when you are by yourself; that moments uninterrupted by someone else are somehow more whole and experienced. But there is an extraordinary level of mutual understanding and respect between Hayley and I (yes, this must be called a tribute to my wonderful friend) that makes moments of inner peace evermore peaceful; being alone with your thoughts is made better by the presence of someone thinking their own.
